You have never made a mistake? Never?! - REALLY?!... LIAR! Yip! That is pretty much my summation of those that seemingly have the inability to offer forgiveness to those that “blunder” along their way. We ALL Blunder!
Yes, yes my dear – we do! I have always done my best not to judge others because, well quite frankly – I prefer not to be judged either. Why does it seem though that so many are just completely hell bent on pointing fingers at others when they make mistakes - be they large or small… Is it because they are perfect and have never faulted? (I sincerely doubt that). Is it because they would prefer the attention not be on them? Is it because belittling someone else makes them momentarily “bigger and better”? Who knows! – But whatever the reason, I think they all need a huge bloody wakeup call! Life is fleeting and those that cannot learn the “art” of forgiveness (yes it is an art) are most certainly living a life short changed!
Heavens, I have done some horrendous things in my life – requiring countless occasions of forgiveness from more people than I care to count… but is that not all part and parcel of what life is about? How do we learn if we don’t err? I have NEVER been and never will be a “book smarts” individual. No, I am a street smarts girl! And yes, I am QUITE ok with that! But, what I have learnt in my life thus far with individuals “like me”… you know… the ones that “wing it”, “work it” and “wax it” is that we are generally very good at ruffling others feathers – mostly unintentionally so…. Often it is simply our thought process in action - and the passion which accompanies that. Passion seldom has manners ;) - We all know this!
I think what I find most upsetting though, – as I look around - is that so many people, equally imperfect, are so VERY quick to cast judgement onto others! I am sorry – did I miss the memo where you get to cast judgement for my ”sins” that vary slightly from your own? Hmmm – I must have! What a gracious and beautiful place this world would be if we could all just be a little more accepting of others. You never really know everything about another person, because people have become so conditioned to building walls and wearing masks, only allowing others to see what they selectively choose to show. The rest of it stays under lock and key. I have brought this into other posts - my parents got divorced when I was 5 years old. I am the youngest of four children and I have often had discussions with people about how each and every one of us was affected differently by that part in our lives because of our different stages of emotional and psychological development at the time.
No two wounds will ever be the same. In learning to understand people, this is an essential element to remember. “When we are judging everything, we are learning nothing.” ― Steve Maraboli I cannot possibly, truly understand what emotional scars and baggage they deal with as adults now, just as much as they will never really understand mine. This is applicable across the board. Lack of forgiveness in itself is a judgement – and the last time I checked… NONE of us were granted that right… unless of course you are flawless?! Are you? No, you are not! None of us are! So best then, that we all exercise a little more humility!
“The weak can never forgive.
The reality is, we ALL F-UP… again, again and again in different ways and on different scales of magnitude, but unless you want to be judged for your errors… my advice would be that you take a bit of a back step in being so quick to condemn others. Time is squandered with condemnation! Take a moment to remember just how imperfectly imperfect YOU are before you wag that finger - and remember that the "difficulty" of all our roads is relative.
Until next time...
Much Love from Cape Town, South Africa xxx
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